Wednesday, November 26, 2008

opossums, thanksgiving, and anxiety.

immediately following last night's blog post,
all three of our four legged critters accompanied me outside for a smoke.
when i first walked outside onto our back porch in the pitch black of the night,
i thought that our kitty-kitty was already outside because it appeared as if i'd almost stepped on her.
i thought this because i caught something out of the corner of my eye that dashed under my feet.
when kitty-kitty joined me on the porch,
i put two and two together.
i was thinking, "wtf?"
then i noticed that harley and jackson picked up on a scent and were on it like white on rice.
i ran inside for a flashlight,
seeing as to how the wifey hasn't had the time to play handyman (which i TOTALLY understand),
and low and behold.
what did i see under the chair?
a opossum.
all i could see was atrocious grey fur and white feet with LONG nails
that semi-resembled cat claws.
i didn't hear any hissing or anything.
i brought my babies back inside and shut the back door.
it eventually left.
but man,
that was really kinda cool.
i'm glad that our babies were okay, though.
i found out that opossum slobber is toxic to doggies.
alls well that ends well.
over the hedge possums Pictures, Images and Photos
tomorrow marks the preparatory time for thanksgiving.
i do so love thanksgiving,
as any family holiday gatherings are great for bonding.
i love that, therefore i love thanksgiving.
i'll be focusing on what i am thankful for.
maybe i'll make a top ten list.
what's funny though,
is i am not a fan of thanksgiving food.
its just kind of...stale to me.
now, give me some damn crimmus food, and i'm all about that shiznits!
Thanksgiving kitty Pictures, Images and Photos
i am worried a bit,
as i can feel my anxiety elevating.
truthfully, i don't know why.
the anniversary, perhaps.
i just keep thinking that i just have to make it through crimmus without going insane.
i know that i am not in control,
but its like maybe thats the root of my anxiety.
simultaneously, however,
i don't want the control.
who knows.
i'll talk to my therapist tomorrow about this.
i really am worried about this,
as i want to enjoy the holidays seasonal festivities with my friends and family.
Anxiety Pictures, Images and Photos

He who thanks but with the lips
Thanks but in part;
The full, the true Thanksgiving
Comes from the heart.
~J.A. Shedd
Angelina Jolie Pictures, Images and Photos
heart Pictures, Images and Photos
For each new morning with its light,
For rest and shelter of the night,
For health and food, for love and friends,
For everything Thy goodness sends.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
lol Pictures, Images and Photos
In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.
~Albert Schweitzer

Soul Spirit Pictures, Images and Photos
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Monday, November 24, 2008


so much to tell, let's see...
last friday finally rolled around and before you knew it,
we were scrambling to get in the car to head to charlotte, nc.
i made incredibly lame half-assed signs declaring,
it was too cute.
Cute Pictures, Images and Photos
after traffic headaches and hiccups,
we finally made our way to the time warner cable arena.
unless you've previously been there,
its a bitch to find.
mapquest be damned.
it ended up with me looking at mapquest's directions in my hand,
honey driving,
us asking random people on the street for directions,
AND my mama on the phone with me looking up directions on her computer in Florence.
*The Map Knows All* Pictures, Images and Photos
i tell you what though, it was WELL worth it.
melissa peterman (aka, Barbara-Jean) sucked BIGTIME.
and whoever the dumb fool it was about three to fours rows back of us
that was incessantly screaming,
"Barbara-Jean! Barbara-Jean! Barbara-Jean! Barbara-Jean! Barbara-Jean!"
i wanted to bitch slap a idiot.
idiot Pictures, Images and Photos
Jesus would slap you Pictures, Images and Photos
joey and his crew arrived to the concert literally moments before reba and kelly graced the stage.
i took a few shots of him with my cell,
just to show my BFF, liz, his proximity to us.
that was cool.
he had third row seats.
< contains envy. >
Envy [still] Pictures, Images and Photos
they opened up with "Sweet Dreams," like they did in january.
most of the set was the same,
although they did change it up a bit.
and, great stars, was it ever for the better!!
knew better Pictures, Images and Photos
kelly's swing song damn near was an orgasmic experience sent from Venus herself.
hot damn.
i KNOW i wasn't the only dyke in the house droolin like a rabid dog over that business!!
my honey's favorite bandmate, carmella,
was knocked up this time.
and my gosh, she WAS more beautiful than EVER.
i've never found her to be hot, like my honey does.
but i must confess, she wears pregnancy very well.
drool tvb Pictures, Images and Photos
Kelly! Pictures, Images and Photos
Kelly Clarkson Icon Pictures, Images and Photos
our seats were, i consider, amazing.
they were on the first tier off the ground directly to the right of the stage.
we were probably all of 25 feet from the queen of country and her princess of pop/rock.
let me tell you,...
ms kelly has put some weight on.
and great buddha!!
does it ever make her all the more appealing!!
she just keeps on getting hotter and hotter from my perspective!!
it seemed like the queen perhaps had a cold,
because when the lights went down,
you could see her blowing her nose.
it was kinda funny.
if thats what it indeed was,
you damn sure couldn't hear any difficulty as she sang.
like always with every concert,
her voice warmed up the further into the concert that it got.
i profusely thanked my honey for treating us to such an exquisite delicacy.
it meant a hell of a lot to me.
we got home around two a.m. that night,
only to awake a little after 9:30-9:45ish saturday morning.
my BFF, ashes, visited us for the day.
we procured her assistance in housework on the new abode.
she also acted as a critter courier,
delivering jackass to us from his kidnappers.
my mom said he did NOT want to get into the car with ashes.
but when ashes got out her truck when she arrived here,
lil jackson perked right up.
the little shit.
we were glad he was returned safely.
bff iconn. Pictures, Images and Photos
all of our pets are happy as they can be now.
pussy has clean water, so he's swimming as much as his hearts' content.
kitty-kitty is kneading everywhere, now that she sleeps indoors because its too cold out.
her personality is coming out now.
she's such a sweetheart.
...but i still think she's evil, reguardless what honey says.
jackson's happy to be reunited with harley farley and cheryl.
and harley couldn't give a shit less that jackson's back.
he just gives a damn about finding a warm lap and a blanket.
ah. splendid bliss.
cofffee bliss Pictures, Images and Photos


**a special thanks to joey for the pictures**

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

jokes on us.

last night, somewhere around 9ish, honey and i walked outside to let harley run around in the big yard so he could drain his lizard. it was freezing outside.
So Happy I could Pee Pictures, Images and Photos
colder than a penguin's balls in antartica.
cold icons Pictures, Images and Photos
looking back, i wish i could've farted just to see if you could see that air, because you could sure as hell see the air you breathed out your booger tunnels.
britneys nose Pictures, Images and Photos
anyways, back to what i was saying... so honey and i were standing there waiting on harley. i turn and face the road and look up at the sky. now see, i didn't have my glasses on so all the stars were blurry. but, i saw what looked like a HUGE shooting star. that bitch looked like a HUGE ball that was on FIRE.
fire Pictures, Images and Photos
it was brighter than Mr. T's gold chains at a BET convention. okay, seriously.
Mad Deep Pictures, Images and Photos
realizing i didn't have my eye balls on, it kind of freaked me out a little bit. i mean, i could plainly see how big it was, and its trail it left behind. shooting stars seem to be small, fast, and further away. but this- seemed much closer than somewhere out there on Zeus' dance floor, like other shooting stars. this moved too slow.
Slow Dancing in a Burning Room Pictures, Images and Photos
were you expecting another joke? its called anticipaaaaaaaaaaaation.

this thing, whatever it was up there, it really did freak me out. i mean, it was like it wasn't computing properly in my head. ya know? sounds crazy, but i swear. that thing was freaky. i am so going to wonder what that thing was for the rest of my life.

......that's what yo mama said last night!!
YO MAMA! Pictures, Images and Photos
i amuse myself. i really do. i suppose that can be a good thing when boredom strikes. but its also kind of... "mentally slow" too. aye. i'm tired and out of jokes now. *sigh* but whatever that thing was that we saw, it was seriously freaky. i'll close this with a fitting quote:
timon pumbaa simba Pictures, Images and Photos
Pumbaa: Hey, Timon, ever wonder what those sparkly dots are up there?
Timon: Pumbaa, I don't wonder; I know.
Pumbaa: Oh. What are they?
Timon: They're fireflies. Fireflies that, uh... got stuck up on that big bluish-black thing.
Pumbaa: Oh, gee. I always thought they were balls of gas burning billions of miles away.
Timon: Pumbaa, with you, everything's gas.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

smooth move, exlax.

apparently i have bruised my tail bone. yes, laugh all you want, fuckers. but this crap HURTS. i can stand and i can lie down. but sitting down is horrible. i cannot get comfortable. i haven't a clue how this transpired. when i told my grandma last night, i was looking for some sincere empathy/sympathy that grandma's are supposed to freely dispense to their grandchildren. the old bag let me down. and i quote, "well sarah, that's what you get when you wait until the last minute to run to the shitter."
left field toilet Pictures, Images and Photos
what. the. HELL. i suppose her theory is that my ass plopped down on the shitter too hard. its plausible. i'll give her that. my my stars! grandmothers are supposed to make it all better! aye... vengence shall rain upon her, yesth, yesth.
she normally does make it all better for me, like the time i fell through the floor at a halloween haunted house. yea, smooth, i know. Danny & Sabrina & I went to a haunted house in Florence out there towards the airport. well all was fine and dandy as we were being guided through it. we came to a stop because of something or another, i forget what.
i fell on the floor Pictures, Images and Photos
the next thing i know, is i'm IN the floor, like up to i think it was my waist. yea. just THAT quick too. i felt like a toddler in one of those baby walkers,, asking to be picked up. my lil arms were straight up in the air as i tried to yell for sabrina. i was short of breath because it scared me so. she had to lift me straight up out of the hole. we got out the house, with me limping and whimpering. finally under some light, i yanked my jeans down to look at my leg. it was shredded from my hip down to my calf. as i was sliding down into that damned hole, the wood floor literally shredded the first couple of layers of skin off of my leg.
little arms Pictures, Images and Photos
because of my heart condition, i knew i needed to have my wound cleaned immediately. we headed for mcleods, where my mom eventually met up with us. by this time i could barely walk, and had to sit in the friggin wheelchair sideways because it hurt my leg to sit any other way. after HOURS and HOURS of waiting, we headed to Carolinas. well they were being bitches there too, so we said screw it and headed home. Sabrina doctored me up with Mama Linda's supervision. i called my grandma the next day and she gave me the grandmotherly support i wanted. eh. old bag. victory shall be mine.
Victory shall be mine Pictures, Images and Photos

Sunday, November 16, 2008

hell yea.

my honey did the most amazing thing ever. (okay, besides building us a nice fancy house, that is.) speaking of fancy...this coming friday, honey and i will hear, "in this world theres a lot of self-righteous hippocrits, That would call me bad,... She said, heres your one chance fancy dont let me down..."
Reba FANCY LIVE Pictures, Images and Photos
yesth, yesth, yesth. Reba & Kelly: 2 Worlds 2 Voices Tour at Charlotte, NC. This will be the second concert of THIS tour that I've seen. The first one was flat out PHENOMINAL. (Perhaps that had something to do with my meeting them both. Gee. Ya think?!) I expect nothing less, on this concert. (Except the meeting them again part.) I KNOW for a FACT that my honey will TRIPLE LOVE LOVE LOVE it like I did.
Reba-Kelly Pictures, Images and Photos
this will be my honey's fourth Reba concert, and my 11th or 12th concert. (I've kinda lost track.) what i haven't lost track of, is that i've met Reba twice and Kelly once.

funny vid.

Click HERE.

Turn volume up.¤t=Video_111508_001.flv

Saturday, November 15, 2008

patchwork pieces.

tomorrow is the big day. my mom arrives to help paint our new house. seems unbelievably surreal. i am 26 years old. i have a wife and two dogs. and on top of it all, i'm still my Grandma's girl. try as i may, no matter how hard i dig my feet into the sand, time still washes ashore with the tide. you can't stop the tide.
the tide Pictures, Images and Photos
i like where i am at, in my life. of course, i still want to change a few things. a little tweak here, a little tweak there...but who doesn't want to tweak their life up a little bit? all things that are meant to be, will be eventually. you can't stop the tide.
Fix These Wings Pictures, Images and Photos
i am so thankful for what i have in my life. the people in my life are my
everything. each person that i love has a specific place inside of me; inside my soul. its funny if you think about heart and soul are like a patchwork quilt of everybody i've loved. when i was born, i had a hole in my heart. to repair it, essentially, they patched it up. i was born a patchwork piece. how about that.
October Patchwork Icon 1 Pictures, Images and Photos
i've been looking at books on tonight. like a fiend, i've been making my wishlist. on it, i have books on abusive fathers, grieving for them, memoirs of estranged father-daughter relationships, and of course, books belonging to my favorite genre, southern memoirs/comedies. i am wanting those books on fathers because he has been on my mind lately. i think its because the holidays are imminent. i have also been in contact with his other daughter. i don't really know what to call her. i don't know what title to label her with. and for somebody with a slight tendency towards OCD, thats annoying.
Not Approved Pictures, Images and Photos
she says she finds herself comparing our lives. i think in comparison, our lives are vastly different, yet strikingly similar. how odd that we can be such a classic paradox. but it is what it is. what will be, will be. i am unsure if we will ever be in contact more than we are now. we weren't raised as sisters, so i think the undefined bond between us leaves us hanging in limbo. i believe we both only have good intentions at heart. to overcome all that hate, all of the lies,...would be a miracle of herculean magnitude. i cannot speak for her, but on my side, i feel my part is breaking the cycle. erradicating that anger, that hate for the next generation. i so hate the thought of passing down his DNA to my child. if i could somehow erase that out of my own DNA profile, i'd do it in a heartbeat. the ties that bind are not made of blood, but with love...not hate. hate can restrict. but that's all it can do. it'll only do what you allow it. and now that he is gone, i am not the only one who can breathe a sigh of relief. (i do not speak for J when i say this.)
sigh penguino Pictures, Images and Photos
his weapon of choice was hate. like a python, he used his hatred to suffocate his victims. a slow, painful agonizing death. he took aim at your greatest weakness, and dove in headfirst to assure his victory. he, like the anaconda, is now nothing more than a legendary monster. at least, from my perspective that is. what still saddens me, in the most odd way, is that he hated me as much as he so passionately did- and he didn't even know me. how does one hate their enemy so without knowing them? that isn't very smart if you ask me. seems to me the best strategy is to get to know your enemy inside out, so you could strike with one, simple and delicate blow. it scares me. it scares me that i have the capability to think like that. that i have the potential within me to be as evil as him. who thinks like that? bad people think like that. i mean, its just messed up.
this is so messed up Pictures, Images and Photos
he was all about fluffing up, like a cobra. but killing like the anaconda. that is the coward's way. he just made a mockery of himself for all to see. i laid in wait. i stalked to know his every move. scrutinized him. i knew his actions and reactions to any and everything in this world. then, i let the prey come to me. and there i sat, in the second row at his funeral with my wife in plain sight, for all of his cohorts to see. his disabled dyke daughter in full view of all of his friends. the thing that mattered most- his precious reputation. well, he mucked that up himself, but i... i reaped the rewards by desecrating his memory. and truth be told, i did so quite happily. somewhere in all of this is definately a therapy session or two.
Therapy Pictures, Images and Photos
my sanity, or the remainder of it, that is, was tied down to ground level, to reality by my wife. she tied it up like a boat to a dock. i thank buddha everyday for that. i really don't know where i would be right now, if she hadn't have been there for me. she hung in there. she didn't give up on me. neither did my family and friends. its hard to rip apart a tightly knit patchwork quilt. the ties that bind the quilt together are made of love- the most durable fiber there is. with that- i am stronger than i ever was.
Strong Pictures, Images and Photos Staying strong Pictures, Images and Photos
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