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Friday, July 25, 2008

wishing.


I am currently reading this book entitled, The Wishing Year. It is a book based on a lady’s experiment with wishing, over the course of a year in her life. To say the least, it is majorly thought provoking. She asks all kinds of questions about wishing; if the act of wishing is the catalyst to change, or is the change spurred on by a mere perception change?
She is a fellow Taurean, practicing Buddhist, with lightly OCD/ADD driven ambitions. The book tends to wander, get winded by other book and author references, and uses hard words A LOT. (Not just big words, but hard words.)
From what I am gathering, the book has great philosophical points, and it touches a lot on spirituality, and acceptance (of everything.) So it has gotten me to thinking; what would I wish for?
I already have the love and support of a wonderful wife, semi psychotic family, and a cast of all shades of friends. I have a roof over my head. And I have food every day. Let’s see, so far, that is; food, clothing, shelter, love, and support.
Perhaps I’d wish for spiritual comfort. That is something that has always eluded me. The fundamentals of pseudo Christianity make no sense to me. I need practicality. I cannot just fly by the seat of my pants on the back of faith. I’d bust my ass. I think learning to believe in myself is a big enough feat in itself, let alone forcing myself to engage in a religion that calls upon an all knowing Creator that is everywhere simultaneously. (Note to reader: these are merely MY opinions. If it offends you, I’m sorry. I do ask for respect of my beliefs, as I do respect your religious beliefs. Another words, to each its own, here, ok? Mmmmk, thanks. Oh, and have a nice day.)
I would wish for healing from old wounds that time can never erase. As I have said, they can fade, but they still remain. I’d wish for direction in my school, and where to go, career wise. I’d wish for C to want a family with me. That in itself is a bittersweet subject, so that’s all I’ll say on that.
I could wish for fortune and fame, like everyone. From personal experience, money brings you nothing. Greed can kill. It does kill. Money does not matter to me; it never has. (And, surprisingly, I can thank my “Dad” for that.)
I am unsure if wishing for something truly has any power behind it. I think if anyone truly believes in something enough, it can happen. And maybe that’s what it is, really. Maybe that’s all anything is. Christianity, Atheism, Buddhism, love, family, friendship, war, peace, equality… It’s all conviction. Just a different flavor per person.

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