labor day vacation.

my adorable bloggers, i've not forgotten you; i've been on vacation with the crazy crew that is my family. overall the trip went great. i do have some remaining sanity left in tact. that totally surprised me, by the way. the majority of my family retreated down to cherry grove beach to a house that belongs to a family member of a family friend. there were quite a few hairy moments during the trip, but overall, it was great.
one favorite moment was a dry ice bomb. that was pretty awesome. then another favorite moment was when we caught some crabs in the crab trap, them bitches was fuckin!! seriously!! attached and everything!! we began packing up the vehicles yesterday when one baby brother got over zealous in his efforts to haul items to various vehicles and tripped on the stairs. long story short, we think he broke his elbow into two places. he went to get a permenant cast today but the swelling was too great for them to properly do so. he has to wait two weeks for new xrays to determine the course of treatment.
naturally i got home to mom's and was a-okay. i woke up this morning sick as a damn dog. idk, so don't ask. i'm going to the doc-in-the-box in the morning. but i was fine the entire trip to the beach, then BAM!! ugh. atleast its not a possible broken elbow like my lil brother. included are beach pics. enjoy!!

the ENTIRE time, sophia (wee-one) pulled her manipulative i'm-so-feeble-hold-me-bullshit. as you can see, one aunt fell for her antics.







the epitome of a vacation, right here, yall. suck it, betches!!








the crabs were attached and gettin jiggy wid it!!









na-na-na-na-na-na, get jiggy wid it....






a humongus hole the twins and their friend dug on the beach; they're pretty proud of it.










front of the house.







the first crab we caught.






the dry ice bomb. heh.











the canal we were on.







"...the bitch is back,...." ~elton john. (my aunt.)








who's jumpin in the canal first?








that shit was chill-ayyyyyyyyyyy

some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit...

okay i am long over due in telling the story of the aforementioned link that is in connection with the picture of the two crated dogs.



Orangeburg, May 2nd, 2009. My Wee-One, Sophia has been in heat for a few days. so, my brilliant self decides to borrow my aunt's 9 month old teacup Chihuahua, Rocco. (also, for any other MAJAH GG's fan out there, i am reminded of the episode in which sophia's bf, Rocco, pretends to rob that bank.) "but i digress," my aunt said that he's been,... 'practicing on the cats,' so i felt assured it was good to go.



how deliciously naive was i to think that it would be easy as a wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am, kinda thing. noooooooooo, not easy for me. ask me anything you want to about most any breed and i can tell you. i once had a great teacher about dogs, so i know a good lil bit. i thought that when the bitch was in heat, you could just put her together with the stud and BAM! yeah,... apparently not. my younger mini-me, my lil brother, E, and i get the brilliant idea to shack the two would-be love birds up into the bathroom.



well being the sophisticated geniuses that my brother and i are, we get to thinking, "how the hell are we going to know if we leave them in them overnight if they did it or not?" so what do we do? we, ladies and gentlesouls, devise an UMMMMMMMMMMMMAZING setup in the bathroom with the webcam. yeah baby. this isn't your 20th century backwoods dog breeder's playpen, baby. no. we're SOPHISTI-MAH-CATED. think britney spears edumacated. be jealous.


yeah. i was texting my BFF, about how this was all absolutely insane. therefore, my WONDERFUL text was born, that you saw on textsfromlastnight.com. i was pretty proud of that fantastic line. yeah. thats just genius all the way around right there. you just WISH you had talent like that. haters.

to sum up this damn story, it was an EPIC FAIL. like SERIOUSLY. the damn dog did everything but the damn deed. my dog was the welcoming slut that she needed to be. all of those hours spent studying Blanche didn't go to waste for my little girl!! but nooooo, Rocco would.NOT.perform. i told my lil brother, E, that Rocco was defective. like a reject from the doggy breeding factory. seriously. ugh. so it would seem that the story ends here, correct? yeah, that would be nice, but no, my dear interwebbers, no. it doesn't end there. apparently my wee-one is hard to resist because now we have a twisted semi-incestuous situation happening now. my darling, adorable grumpy old man, harley, has now taken it upon himself to screw her brains out. they have, well,... pardon moi bluntness here,...but they've gone so far as to have gotten STUCK. no big deal, other than the gross factor right? yeah well. my grumpy old man,... got.FIXED.FOUR.YEARS.AGO. yeahhhh... take THAT, rocco. THAT is how its done, ya lil factory reject. harley is THE man.... too bad its with his adopted sister... and too bad its all in vain. /sigh.

funny vid.

Click HERE.

Turn volume up.

http://s152.photobucket.com/albums/s199/MRS_Tinker_Bell_2_U/?action=view¤t=Video_111508_001.flv

family's the best.

i have officially secured my title as "the best big sister in the world." i taught mah boy what bein a country boy was all about. that freckle faced grin was all the confirmation i needed. absolutely adorable, witty, charming, and sarcastic as can be. he does me proud!
i thoroughly enjoyed spending time with him this week. and i think C did too. i think she'd make a great mama. she doesn't think so, but i do. but then again, if the situation ever comes about (*crosses fingers*), she'll be the super stressed, grey haired, hair thinning, needin xanax'es mama. i'd be the cool, laid back milf. yea, that's right, i said it,...MILF. fuck yea.
i genuinely hope and pray that one day C and i can arrive to the point of both being ready, willing, and able to have a family of our own one day. until then, call me the damn dog mama. < ahem >
anyways, our house is slowly coming along. the foundation is complete!! woohoo!!