violet skies.

cheryl & i went to atlanta this weekend to see a very sordid affair. it got canceled due to snow but we met everybody at an elite hotel bar. everybody was so down to earth, it was unreal. i got the inside scoops on certain hollywood elites that were fascinating. leave it to me to have a clutz moment. i wore three inch fuck me pumps in a snow and ice covered atlanta and didnt slip. i get to cheryl's house and slip barefooted on a sock and landed on my knee. only me, i tell ya.


i got my truck back, for which i'm grateful and relieved. now i won't be trapped at home any longer. this coming tuesday i may have a possible run-in with my dad and step mom's daughter. we were both invited to a poetry night at a local coffee house. i'm a confirmed guest, she a maybe guest. i don't want any shit. no fake conversation, no nothing. i wanna enjoy my night with my friends and my cousin.

this week is vintage picture week on facebook. i'll leave yall with my vintage picture. its the first time i met reba.

klutzy mommy.

i truly don't know what the deal was yesterday. i evidently somehow displeased the gods and goddesses up on Mount Olympus, because all day i was the biggest damn klutz EVER. i busted my ass on two separate occasions and rather politely and efficiently rammed my head into the corner of our kitchen cabinet. yea. ouch.

today after mah sugar tits laid down for her pre-work nap, i was playing with my fwiend, ms. interwebs. usually during this time i do my bestest to keep the three amigos quiet as possible. sometimes it works. and sometimes they look at me like i'm the damn dumbass. but i digress; so they started carrying up a ruckus for the umpteenth time within a span of ten minutes. aggravated, i yelled from my office, "shut up, dumbass!" this did not work, so i stood up to walk in there to give them the dreaded finger point. however, what i discovered upon entering the living room was that i called my mother-in-law a dumbass. nice. go me. yeaaaa... how many people out there have wanted to secretly do that and get away with it? i was ashamed and profusely apologized, amidst our laughter.

when she came on in, we sat on our back porch to smoke and catch up. our three children began playing out in their fence. you see, its very interesting; harley will get jackson all riled up to wrestle and run around. then, my pint sized princess, sophia, will obsessively target jackson to grasp a firm hold of, and go to town humping him ever so relentlessly. she's not picky; she'll hump whatever she can get... his head, his legs, his rump, his sides... you get the picture. this is every. single. time. jackson and harley play. its so funny and disturbing.

and finally, here are some pictures of our almost completed master bedroom. (the only things remaining to complete are installing curtain rods and hanging the curtains.) here are several noteworthy ponits i must make:
-yes, the walls ARE purple.
-that IS a queen sized four post canopy bed.
-yes, that IS a tink lamp beside the bed. (thanks ashley!!) how could i NOT incorporate her somehow?!
-the white blanket in the corner by the window is sitting atop the dog crates.
-the comforter/bed skirt/shams/ and curtains are all eyelet white.

dryer snafu.

it has been unanimously decided that the four kids from my mama are THE.BIGGEST.KLUTZES.IN.THE.WORLD. seriously, i have concluded its some sort of DNA chromosome that we all inherited. a genetic mutation of sorts. (as if i didn't have enough of those as is!) let me site two find examples to prove my theory.

when all four of us siblings were little, we were forced to sit miserably at the table for supper. oh the injustices! but i digress, our mom would fix us all our plates of food and drinks, where we'd then begrudgingly eat most likely spaghetti. we would hem and haw over this dish, not because it was nasty, no. rather, because we ate that stuff AT LEAST two to three times per week. (which is the solid reason i put a cap on the number of times honey cooks spaghetti per year.) then after everybody was seated and pushing their food around on their perspective plates, mom would fix yet another glass of milk, bring a towel, bring an additional set of silverware, and depending on the level of chaos that day, another plate full of food. six people eating, but seven places set. why, might you ask? let's revisit that pesky chromosomal defect shall we? it was never a question of if, but when any child would: 1- drop their utensil 2- spill their milk or 3- (on a particularly evening of high volume lunacy) spill their milk into their plate and drop their utensil. it was a guarantee. sure as the turn of the tide. clockwork. seriously.

now let's fast forward a decade or so, to last night. "picture this," a brother and a sister, a dryer, an unlit cigarette, and a lent trap. earlier in the day, the a.d.d. afflicted sister sets out to go smoke on her back porch, but she gets sidetracked. no doubt, by something shiny. once she pulled herself away from the shimmering object, she forgets where she laid the intended cigarette she was going to smoke. chalking it up to years of previous one too many happy pills, she shrugs it off and grabs another, forgetting all about it. later that day this brother comes to his sister's aid with her atrocious, never ending mound of wretched laundry. said brother switches the wet clothes from the washer to the dryer while said sister removes the lint filter from the lint trap to clean it. it was at this precise moment when the clusterfuck occurred. though it happened in probably a matter of two seconds, it felt like it was on the slow motion setting. the brother stands up and turns toward sister to help her put the lint filter back in. with both people guiding the filter back into its abode, the lost cigarette appears from nowhere sitting beside the currently empty hole of the filter's home. the bottom corner of the filter catches the cigarette and down it fell into the rabbit hole into the land of the mythical sock monster. which i believe to highly resemble oz.

an hour and a half to two hours later, the said brother saves the day and gallops into the setting sun. he retrieved the cigarette. several retrieval methods were utilized: the arm down the rabbit hole, a straightened coat hanger with tape around it backwards as to theoretically stick to the cigarette and pull it to safety, an extension cord with tape around the male part to serve the same purpose as the coat hanger, turning the stupid thing on to see if it'd blow it out, and finally, sticking brother's arm up the exhaust end of the dryer that is on the outside of the house.

yeaaaaaa. who the hell else would this happen to?! seriously!! enjoy the pictures from our merry little experience.