the toilet's a slut.

i had an interesting conversation with one of my besties via text last night.
i was inquiring about her upset tummy that she's had for a few days,
and decided to get a lil creative in my questioning.
enjoy.
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Me: Sooo... Ya bum still romancing le toilet?
Her: Not as much thank goodness.
Me: Good. Ya bum can do better than that toilet anyways. That toilet is a slut. She sees other bums, she smells funny, and she swallows.
Her: LoL swings too.
Me: Filthy whore.
Her: That's ok I'm cheating with the other one.
Me: I hope you're using protection. Never know what diseases that harlot has!
Her: LoL yeah Scott t.p.
Me: LoL. We're nuts. You are aware of that rt?
Her: LoL that's what makes us, well, us.