so wrong.

currently my voice sounds like a mixture of my normal self and a deflating whoopie cushion all rolled into one. enticing, isn't it? yesterday the doctor prescribed medication for this viral thingy in my throat. he offered me: mouthwash, pill, or a liquid. i chose the mouthwash. he forewarns me that its nasty, but i nonchalantly shrug my shoulders, acting like a retarded badass, and say, "no problem."

WRONG.

that crud is not nasty, no. its NASTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY. its lydocane GEL mouthwash/gargle. the bastard who invented this shit is one sick and twisted son of a bitch. its worse than a mixture of rubbing alcohol, imodium liquid, and castor oil. oh. my. effing. stars. if its a man who invented it, i hope his nuts shrivel up and he talks in a soprano octave for the remainder of his life. if a chick invented it, i want to go kick her in her noonoo, her taco...until baby bush admits one hundred percent responsibility for all the war crimes he committed.

its pointless to note, but i shall anyways, i'll be calling my doctor monday morning for that pill to replace this crap. i tell you, this shit should be used at guantanamo bay for their torture techniques. screw waterboarding. this shit is guaranteed to work more efficiently.