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Sunday, November 8, 2009

nothingness.

i feel like a carcass that has been gutted. i'm empty inside. i am a hollow shell of myself. i cried myself to sleep last night, and i honestly want to again tonight. she is in charleston, three sheets to the wind, having a grand ol' time, living it up, partying, laughing, and carrying on. i'm at my mother's listening to one of my brothers blow his nose. when will this crippling aching subside? i cannot carry this pain much longer; every breath hurts, every beat of my heart cries for her, every dream yearns for her, for her touch, her caress, her kiss, her love.

i am not coming undone; i am undone. i am nothing. i am not a wife, i am not a partner. i am not me.

i am nothing.

1 comments:

Lisa said...

Well, I just found my way in here and I'm glad I did. I'm also terribly sorry for how you hurt. :-(